


Bi Bi Babes

by Atol



Category: Real Person Fiction, mcyt
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Anal Sex, Bigender!Bad, Bisexual!Skeppy, Blow Jobs, Clothed Sex, Coming Out, Creampie, DTeam Polycule is also only mentioned sorz, Edging, Miscommunication, Not So Secret Identity, Other, Overstimulation, Paradise Found, Praise Kink, Riding, Vurbity is background, alternating povs, im here, im projecting to explore my own understanding of gender, im queer, pay attention to the chapter names, power bottom!bad, the platforms stay on during sex by popular demand, this is fully self indulgent at every turn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:01:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27871965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atol/pseuds/Atol
Summary: This is crack treated seriously, the GoodGirlHalo twitter handle and discord made me do it.
Relationships: Dream/George/Sapnap, Skeppy/Badboyhalo, Vurb/Quackity, skephalo - Relationship
Comments: 10
Kudos: 256





	1. Plot

**Author's Note:**

> Don't even look at me this the most self indulgent thing I've ever done in my life, doNT LOOK AT ME OKAY

"You know...eventually he's going to find out. It'd be better if you told him yourself." Finn says, and Bad just shrugs and hunches her shoulders a little.

She had called Finn for make-up advice, not whatever this intervention is.

"I just….I'm not ready for that yet Finn." She says as she turns her head side to side to check how even the wings of her eyeliner were. "Does this look like too much? Are they even?" 

Finn squints at the screen and then nods. 

"Yeah it's even, and I think it's balanced enough, just a touch past natural but nowhere near an evening look. It's perfectly fine for going to get coffee." Was Finn's assessment. 

Smiling brightly she pats down her wig and adjusts her deadpool beanie. Her outfit wasn't all that different from her boy clothes, same color palette but different fit. The only real difference was her under shirt and skirt. Black hoodie, faded red lacy cami underneath. Black skirt, and plain grey sneakers. But it made her feel pretty and more comfortable in her skin when she felt like her world went a little to the right and she was well, a she. 

It wasn't always like that, she was a he just as often and she didn't want to take any steps to change her body per se, she just wanted to go out and get groceries or a coffee without flinching at assumed pronouns. Clothes and makeup and a slightly higher tone was all it took and all she needed to settle back into her skin again when her brain flipped the switch.

Finn’s voice broke her out of her idle musing.

"I get that you're nervous, but Bad? You really have to tell him." She heard him sigh. "You can't hide it forever. All it takes is one wrong angle and a left out wig and the internet will explode and it won't be on your terms anymore. I just want you to have control on this."

"I know...I know." Bad mutters, twirling a lock of the wig in her fingers. "I will. Eventually! Anyways, I gotta go, thank you again for the help, talk to you later!" And she hung up on him quickly, tugging her purse across her body and headed out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy wasn't really sure why he was out right now. He had wanted to hop on a call with Bad but he had told him that he couldn't, that he was busy talking to Finn. Which. What the fuck was up with /that/. Something about it had irked him and he had found himself walking out his house and down the street aimlessly, hands shoved in his pockets as he scowled at the ground.

His thoughts had been interrupted by his stomach growling, and he veered into a coffee shop, figuring he would grab a drink and sandwich while he was out. There was a girl ahead of him in the line with a muffin shaped purse, and all he could think of was Bad. Huffing at his mental inability to think about anything else, he finally looked away from the purse, only to catch the girls eyes instead.

/oh fuck- how long was I zoning out- she probably thinks I'm a creep staring at her ass- oh shit/

"I like your purse!" He blurts out, trying to reassure her he wasn't doing anything weird. "Haha, it ah, makes me think of someone I know." 

"I-is that s-so?" She asks, sounding out of her mind with nerves and Skeppy frowns in concern.

He was also caught a little off guard, if he was to be honest. She was /pretty/, pretty enough he feels a little tongue tied as her bright green eyes shifts away from him. Her face was so delicate, made-up to emphasize her eyes and smile. He quirks his brows at her as she stands there, seemingly speechless as she looks back at him, wide-eyed.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asks and she looks away from him slightly, hands grasping her purse strap.

He puts his hands up and leans back a little, not wanting to put her on edge any more so than she already was.

"Sk-! Yeah! P-perfectly f-fine! Oh, would you look at that, that's my order, gotta go!" She practically squeaks before grabbing her drink and high tailing it out of the shop, leaving Skeppy more confused than ever. 

"...That was weird." He mutters as he turns to order his own drink.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad was power walking and trying not to hyperventilate while at it. Her frap was sloshing in its cup but she didn't pay it any mind, too focused on getting home. A bundle of different racing thoughts tangling in her head.

That was Skeppy, there was not a single doubt from the second she had caught sight of him standing there, she had known. She had known when he spoke, and when he looked at her in confusion and it had taken everything in her to not reveal her secret. 

Honestly she had thought he figured it out, he had been staring for a good few minutes, but there was a tense sense of relief at the polite, if a little distracted look in his eyes. 

/He didn't recognize me/

Finally getting through her front door she slumped against it as Rat danced at her feet.

"Oh well hello there, little baby girl, my sweet little doggo, how are you? Such a good girl." She cooes at Rat as she crouches down to pet her. "I just had a scare, yes I did!" 

She laughs breathlessly as she sips at her drink and stands again. Her heart pounding in her chest, but she feels almost giddy. She had met Skeppy in person, even if it hadn't necessarily been in the best of circumstances, and Skeppy didn't realize it. She felt bad that he didn't realize, but at the same time she was still marveling over the fact she saw him in flesh. 

He was just as attractive in real life as he was on video call and she almost hated him for it. Her knees had gone weak when she had caught him staring for more than just one reason.

Taking off her wig she carefully sets it on its hanger and sighs. She also took off and threw her purse back into her closet and kicks the door shut before collapsing into her computer chair.

"That was too close...I'm gonna need a new purse...muffins, I really liked that one, too." She mumbles to herself as she slides her jacket off and throws it towards her bed. 

Maybe she would have to stick inside for a while, when dressed like this. As much as she loves her skirts she just can’t stand the idea that Skeppy's face could twist in disgust, that he'd be mad at the fact she had kept such a secret from him for as long as they had known each other.

It was irrational, she /knew/ it was. He was friends with Finn and never showed any disgust with him.

But, Finn didn't have a crush on Skeppy, and that seemed to make all the difference in Bad's mind. It was one thing to be supportive about a friend, it was another thing entirely to be perused romantically by someone like her. 

At least, that was what the negative thoughts that pop up in Bads head try to convince her.

All of her friends had individually and collectively assured her and tried to prove to her that there was no way that Skeppy would react badly, but she was stubbornly refusing to listen to any of it. 

Rubbing her palms on her skirt she frowns as she idly spins left and right, letting her mind wander back to the harrowing meeting with Skeppy. He had looked so out of it, was he getting sick? She chewed at her bottom lip and made a face at the taste of her lip gloss. 

"Ugh, gross...why do the best ones taste so bad?" 

The bleep of her computer pinging, and then the heart stopping jingle of a voice call had her scrambling for the mouse, hands shaking as she clicks on the accept, mindful not to turn on her video. 

Skeppy's face came into view and her heart stops, stuttering in her chest.

He was sipping on a coffee and she moves her cup out of line of sight of the camera, even though the camera isn't on yet. 

"BaaaaaaAAAAAD!" Skeppy whines at her through the screen.

"Yes, 'Geppy?" She says, struggling to not let her voice waver as she hastily uses makeup wipes and checks a nearby mirror. 

Good enough, she could always just throw a filter on and blame it in lack of sleep.

"Bad turn on your camera, what is this?" He complains, blowing bubbles in his drink near his mic for added effect.

Scrunching her nose at the unwanted ASMR she tugs on her well worn hoodie nearby, not even thinking as she slid the blue clothing on, and checked once more before turning on her camera. Her form was fuzzy for a moment before it focused properly and she smiles, waving at Skeppy with forced cheerfulness.

"I'm here, I'm here. What's up Skeppy?" She asks, fingers clenching tight on the fabric of her skirt.

"I just wanted to talk to you, you were soooooo busy with Finn earlier." He says, pouting at the other in an over dramatic way.

It has Bad’s heart tripping in her chest.

"Oh, just to call? You're not recording, right?" Bad asks softly, trying to just ease her own nerves. 

Obviously if he had connected the dots he would have come out with that first, right? She could stop being paranoid, everything was fine, perfectly normal.

"Nah, I'll be streaming later if you want to join, but nothing right now. Just wanted to talk to you." 

There was a moment of comfortable silence as they both tried to look like they weren't looking at each other.

Bad thanks her lucky stars for the moment, that her heart rate is finally getting a break and she relaxes more into her chair.

Skeppy fidgets for a moment before talking again. "Met a girl at a coffee shop today actually, made me think of you." 

Ah, there's the racing heart she had just gotten rid of.

"Oh?" She asks in a slightly strangled voice, coughing before sipping on her frap as covertly as she could.

"Yeah, honestly I think she was a fan or something, she had a muffin purse and I swear to god she almost called me Skeppy before running off, that's the only logical thing is that she's a fangirl or something."

Bad could only make a soft humming noise in response, too busy trying to keep her cool as Skeppy rambles.

"I think she got nervous 'cause she ran out, like, right after seeing me. At least I hope she was a fan and just nervous, or else I just scared the shit out of a random girl by staring at her purse like a weirdo." Skeppy says, trying to fill the silence that Bad was leaving him with.

Taking the best opportunity afforded to her she laughs at Skeppy, which only led to her laughing louder at the look of outrage Skeppy gave her.

"Of course you'd scare her off, if you're just standing there ogling her!" Bad manages to joke.

"I wasn't!" He shrieks, "I was just looking at her purse! Bad you- no! Bad, don't make me out to be a creep, come on man!" Skeppy laughs, missing the wince that Bad had at his 'man'.

"You can't just stare at people in public 'Geppy." Bad laughs, glad for her breathlessness and reddened cheeks being able to be blamed on the laughter.

Skeppy just rolls his eyes and smiles meekly. 

"I swear, I wasn't staring! Like yeah, she was cute but like, dude, have more confidence in me I won’t just drool like a caveman, for fuck’s sake."

"Language!!" She shrieks as Skeppy laughs at her.

She uses the situation to pretend to be more mad than she is to cover for the rapid blush taking over her face at the indirect compliment.

"Anyways, forget about that, get on Hypixel, let's play some bedwars.

"Sure." Bad says, glad the moment had passed with her secret intact.

The next day, Bad get up, as normal. Feds Rat, cooes and pets her, made himself some breakfast, and thought about his day yesterday. Finn was right, and he could admit that, he really could. But it was just so terrifying. To think of a world where Skeppy looked at him differently, a world without his best friend by his side, figuratively speaking. Where he knew the worst kept secret among their friend group, and just stopped talking to him.

He knew logically, and there was that thought again. Logic. Logically, he reminds himself, there was no reason to think Skeppy would turn his back on him. He had never been cruel to Finn, had never judged him in any way beyond teasing. He was fine with gay people, he never had anything bad to say, never made comments that would make Bad think he was a bigot. 

He didn’t even seem to bat much of an eye when Dream, George, and Sapnap let everyone else in their circles know they were together in a polycule. He just made a joke about George hogging all the dudes and left it at that, and yet- 

Bad still felt a dark deep worry gnaw at his gut when he thought about telling Skeppy the truth. 

There was just something that held him back from letting the other know. He knew he really should, that he should just tell him, rip the bandaid off and face whatever would come after. But every time he opened his mouth the words got caught in his chest, wrapped around his heart and squeezed. 

He had tried last night, hands still rubbing over his skirt as he talked with Skeppy until late at night. They had played a few rounds, switched to a few different games, until they finally logged off and just talked. He couldn’t possibly pull any of the threads of conversation they had flowed through, but he can remember vividly the smiles, the laughs, Skeppy’s face hidden behind his sweater paws as he hid after saying something that made Bad laugh. 

Remembers trying to say something, and immediately losing any confidence he had at the time when Skeppy let him know he was going to go stream, and Bad had waved off his invite to stay on call in favor of taking a shower and going to bed. 

He didn’t have anything to do today that would be that mentally taxing. He had done the editing and now was just waiting for everything to finish rendering. Skeppy was busy doing who knows what, had just told him he would be busy and not much else. So he was stuck at home. Forced to relax and be alone with his thoughts, which was not what he wanted. As he sat there, idly watching Rat trot around at his feet, pawing at his legs until he pats his leg and she scrambles up on his lap. 

“Just you and me today Rat.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy was not busy. Well, that’s a lie. He was busy, just not in the way that he had led Bad to think. He was busy pestering Finn over messenger to try and find out why Bad and he had been on so many calls recently. He wasn’t getting very far. 

He reads the message again and scoffs before crossing his arms and spinning in his computer chair as he tries to think of how to get Finn to crack. He just kept saying it was chatting, but there was no way. No. Way. That Bad was /just/ chatting with Finn this much for no reason. No way. He switches tactics and leaves Finn alone, and tries to call Vurb instead. 

“What’s up?” Was Vurb’s first words as soon as the voice call loaded.

“What is going on with Bad and Finn.” Skeppy immediately demands, a hair away from just banging his fists on his desk. 

“...What? What does that even mean dude.” Vurb says, opening another message tab to start filling Quackity in on the situation. 

ToeKing: Our friends are idiots.

ElQuacko: what did bad say now

ToeKing: its skeppy this time

Vurb is dragged back to the voice call as Skeppy squawks at him. 

“I can hear you typing, what are you typing, who are you talking to?” Skeppy does slap his hands on his desk at this point, frustrated with how his friends were acting right now. “What is this? Am I in some sort of conspiracy? VURB TALK TO ME MAN.” 

“...You need to relax. Just tell me what’s going on, I literally have no idea what you are talking about.” Vurb says as he switches to his phone to keep messaging Quackity. 

ToeKing: Skeppy is getting suspicious about finn and bad doing their makeup meetings but he doesnt know thats what they are up to

ElQuacko: ...how does he not know i thought everyone knew now??

ToeKing: Bad is very good at avoiding things he shouldnt

Vurb makes the appropriate listening hms and uh huhs as Skeppy ranted at length about the fact that Bad was randomly not available when before he had always been able to jump on call whenever Skeppy asked, and that he was spending a lot of time with Finn and he didn’t like it, not one bit. 

ElQuacko: Well lemme know when you are done with the screaming man child

ElQuacko: We still on for later?

ToeKing: Ofc, ttyl babe <3

ElQuacko: <3

“Skeppy...you do realize that Bad has friends outside of you, right?” Vurb tests the waters and immediately cringes as Skeppy explodes in outraged sputters. “Listen, listen listen listen. Listen for a second, dude. Real talk for just a moment. Bad is his own man, he doesn’t have to be available to you twenty four seven, and honestly, this is something you should talk to /him/ about. Have you even asked him about it?”

Dead silence is the most telling answer that Vurb gets. 

“Zak, just talk to him. Stop asking everyone else and just talk to him. Directly. Preferably sooner rather than later. You weirdo.”

“Fuck off Vurb.” 

“You know I’m right.” 

“Whatever dude, I’ll talk to you later.” 

ToeKing: Screaming child has been neutralized

ElQuacko: thank fuck get your ass in the call.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad’s phone going off like crazy was what woke him up from his cat nap on the couch. He swipes at the screen and squints, rubbing at his eyes as he tries to read the many messages. Swinging his feet over he sits up and blinks. 

It was probably about half a novel’s worth of texts from Skeppy that all basically boiled down to the same thing. Get on voice chat. Now. 

Jumping to his feet, heart in his throat, he quickly logs on and gets an incoming vid call almost immediately. Answering it, he cocks his head to the side and swallows thickly. 

“Skeppy, what’s going on, are you okay? Did something happen?” Bad asks, the worry and confusion genuine. 

“Oh my god, Bad, finally! I need to talk to you like right now, wh-” And he trails off, eyes seeming to focus on something behind Bad, before snapping back over to his face. 

Licking his lips for a second and swallowing, he opens his mouth again before Bad would ask him what was wrong. 

“I uh, I need to talk to you about some stuff about my ah, my server.” He finally manages. 

“About your server.” Bad says, skeptically. 

“Yea-yeah. Uh-” Skeppy starts, and goes into his staff’s notes and just starts on any and all problems and issues they had noted within the last month or so, regardless of if they had been fixed or not. 

Because there was no way in hell Skeppy was going to talk about the girly clothes and what he just /knew/ had to be a wig in the corner of Bad’s screen just barely on camera. There was no way he was going to bring up anything about Finn, and anything about his stuff being there because he was going to erase it from his memory and decidedly Not think about all of the details that made up a picture he didn’t want to accept. 

If he didn’t confirm it, he could pretend that Bad and Finn weren’t dating. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad isn’t really sure what to make of the last couple of days. She was still trying to work her way up to trying to talk to Skeppy, had honestly thought that maybe, just maybe that was what Skeppy had been so adamant about talking to her about. But no, he had just wanted help with administrative stuff with his server, which was admittedly odd. He usually didn’t really have to ask, he had a pretty good handle on it and his staff was more than capable. But when Bad had tried to press, Skeppy had only diverted the attention right back onto the server issues, and Bad had given up trying to figure out what else could be going on after the third attempt. 

So Bad let it go, because honestly she wasn’t so sure she was ready, as much as she was trying to psych herself up to it, and instead decided that it would be safe enough to go out for a little. She would just avoid the same coffee shop, maybe go shopping at the mall. 

Feeling a little more outgoing than usual, she rummages around in her closet for a bit before letting out a soft triumphant sound as she finds her platforms. They were a little old, but she loves them dearly, being one of the first things she had bought when exploring her gender and presenting as female in the beginning of it all. 

They were expensive too, half the reason why they lasted as long as they had so far. They were soft to the touch, the black leather well cared for, if a little creased in some places, and the laces were a faded red, she would have to replace them soon again. The heels on them had a solid squish to them that meant her feet wouldn’t be crying by the end of this. 

Going back to her drawers, she finds her tights and quickly throws together a cute, if slightly on the punky side of things, outfit and smiles at the reflection she caught in the mirror. A cute pop of color in the form of a yellow sundress with a repeating sun pattern, and one of her black zip up hoodies and she was set. She glances at her wig before shrugging. Her hair was getting pretty long now, she usually kept it in a small ponytail at the back of her head, and with layers it almost looked the same as short hair when she did so for streams. If all else failed she just stuck a hat on and tucked it up inside. No one was the wiser that she had been growing it for a while.

Twisting from side to side, she grins at the outfit she had put together. She never really understood the way that others who presented femininely shied away from tallness. She felt like an amazonian when wearing her boots, like she could take on anyone. She was never more sure of herself, as she was when she strode through public, a good half inch above most others around her. 

Make up was the least intensive part of this, she does barely anything, just a swipe of lip gloss and her water line done up in a dark dark green. 

She grabs her wallet out of her muffin purse and sets the thing on her bed instead, rolling her eyes at it. 

“You almost outed me, you’re not coming with.” She scolds it, as if it could hear her. 

Flouncing out of the room she makes sure that Rat is properly supplied with treats and love before headed to the mall. She wasn’t looking for anything in particular, but maybe she would get some more dresses. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy hadn’t been able to get a hold of himself since he got up. He brushes his teeth and thinks about Bad and Finn holding hands. He logs onto his server and thinks about it, he tries to play with Rocco and can’t get the idea of them dating out of his head the entire time he plays tug of war. 

He had it bad and he wasn’t even willing to admit it to himself. 

Instead he finds himself at the mall, wandering aimlessly and trying not to think about his friends. 

As he walks, he runs smack into someone, managing to knock a few bags loose from their hands straight onto the ground. Sputtering out an apology, he bends down to pick up their bags and looks up, and up and up and up. 

He swallows as he realizes he was in a somewhat compromising position, knelt down at the feet of a strangely familiar woman, who was in a high set of platforms and a dress that just barely skimmed her knees. 

“Sorry! Sorry I wasn’t looking where I was going, ah, have we met before?” He says as he stands, holding out her bags. 

He takes a moment to really take in her features and then snaps his fingers before pointing at her.

“You! You were the muffin girl at the coffee shop!” He says, and is shushed almost immediately as his shouting was drawing attention. 

“Yes, yes that’s me, didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s impolite to point?” She says, batting his hand out of her face. 

“Oh-oh, sorry, ah. Sorry. I wasn’t expecting to run into you again.” He says, before holding out a hand. “I’m Zak.”

She hesitates before taking his hand and giving him a gentle but firm handshake. 

“...Hallie.” She says and smiles at him meekly before lifting her bags.

They stood in a slightly awkward silence, before Skeppy pointes a thumb over his shoulder. 

“Do you wanna grab something to eat at the food court?” He asks, and immediately questions why he did so. 

/Oh man this girl definitely thinks I’m a freak./

Hallie tilts her head and then nods slowly. 

“Sure. What did you have in mind?” She asks softly, switching her bags from one hand to the other and flexing her hand. 

“Whatever looks good, I hadn’t really thought that far.” Skeppy admits with a giggle, before pointing at the bags. “You want me to take those?” 

He watches her smirk for a moment as if she thought he was funny, before handing the bags over. 

He fumbles a little and his eyes widen as he feels just how heavy everything was, but he was already too far in, he couldn’t go back now. 

“What do you even have in these?” He asks as he finally evens himself out, dividing the bags equally across both hands. 

“Shoes, mostly. A few dresses. Oh! A set of decorative knives I found in one of the speciality shops, that’s probably what you are feeling.” She says with a gleeful look. 

“Decorativ- ya know what, I’m not going to ask.” He says quickly.

She only laughs at him, and he absently thinks that it's a noise he’d like to cause again. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad is trying not to panic. She hadn’t even thought before popping off with a random name, and now she was sitting at a table, waiting for Skeppy to come back with a tray of food. 

She didn’t know what part of her brain thought that this could end in anything other than heartbreak, and she was holding her hands in her lap, desperately trying to stop the shaking. 

Skeppy /had/ to know. He /had/ to. There was no way he was looking at her with her minimal make up and /couldn’t/ sus out the fact that she was one and the same with his best friend. There was no way. He was just getting her to sit so he could talk directly without drawing attention to them, wasn’t he? He was going to get back with the food and make fun of her, wasn’t he?

She jumps a little when Skeppy finally comes back and sets the tray of chinese food on the table and takes a seat across from her with a somewhat timid smile. 

/Why was he acting so nervous? I’m the one about to get an earful, why is he smiling like that at me?/

“Ah, I. Didn’t know what you would like so I just sort of got the standard stuff. Eggroll?” He asks her, pushing said roll towards her side of the tray with his chopsticks. 

Bad just blinks for a moment before feeling a confused smile spread on her face as she takes the eggroll with a quiet thanks. 

/There is so way.../

“So! Come here….often?” Skeppy asks, and Bad has to bite her lip to stop the guffaw that threatens to burst out of her at just how awkward Skeppy was acting. 

“Wh- Skep-!” She tries to ask him why he is acting so weird, but claps a hand over her mouth, eyes wide in fear at her slip up as his eyes light up. 

“I knew it!” He crows.

Her legs shake a little under the table from anxiety, and her eyes dart around looking for the best route to run to but then his next words strike her dumb. 

“I just knew you were a fangirl, there was no way that it was a coincidence that you had a muffin purse /and/ almost called me Skeppy. Oh my god, I knew it. I cannot wait to tell Bad about this.” Skeppy says with a laugh. 

Turning back to look at him with a blush high in her cheeks she blinks at him.

“Tell...Bad?” She asks, as if she isn’t quite ready to believe that Skeppy still hadn’t figured it out yet. 

“Well, yeah I’m assuming you are a fan of his too, like come on. I didn’t even know there /were/ muffin purses.” He says as he picks at his share of the sweet and sour chicken. 

“O-oh...Sorry this ah-This is awkward.” She mutters, looking down at her lap. 

“Oh, fuck, no I’m sorry-” He starts and she couldn’t help it. 

“Language!” She says before putting her hand on her mouth again, as if that would stop her from making this worse than it already was. 

He just laughed loudly at that and kept talking. ”-Oh yeah no, you are a fan for sure, this is probably super weird for you. I swear I’m not like, trying to take advantage or anything. I don’t do the like, the groupie thing. Not to say you seem like a groupie! You just seemed cool, I guess. If you want to leave I’m not going to be like, weird or anything.” 

It was sort of cute, she thought distantly, that he was so worried about her comfort about this. 

She giggles at his rambling softly and raises an eyebrow at him. 

“Do you have many experiences with groupies?” She teases. 

He chokes on his bite of food and wheezes as she laughs at him. 

/Maybe, this won’t go badly.../

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy is still in a bit of a daze, after everything is said and done. He and Hallie had talked for close to an hour before her phone had gone off and she stood up to leave, saying she had to get home. When he had asked about her number she had stuttered and hesitated, and just when he had backed off and started to ramble about how she didn’t need to feel like she owed him anything, she had stopped him with a gentle look and given him her twitter handle. GoodGirlHalo, which, if he hadn’t already figured out how big of a fan she was, that would have been the final nail in the coffin. 

He had laughed at her when she had given it, and she had only blushed and sputtered, before wacking him in the arm softly with one of her shopping bags and stomping away as he called his goodbyes after her. 

So now he was back home and spinning in his computer chair, trying to organize his thoughts. He didn’t really know Hallie, he knew this, but something about talking to her, that short time spent together felt more comforting than he could have guessed. He clicked instantly as soon as he got her talking, and she was just. So. Pretty. He didn’t normally get this stuck on looks, he honestly leaned more towards men when it came to his preferences, but he really liked looking at her. He was surprised she hadn’t called him out on just straight up staring while they talked. 

A ping came through on his screen and he stops idly spinning to squint at the text. 

JustVurb: did you talk to Bad yet?

Sighing, he leaned over and sticks his headphones on before clicking on the call button. 

Vurb answers after a few seconds pause and Skeppy rolls his eyes as soon as his friend’s voice comes through. 

“Did you?” Vurb asks.

“Nothing to talk about, I get it. Bad has his own life outside of me. It’s- it’s whatever man.” Skeppy says, laying his head on his arms propped up on his desk. 

“Skeppy wha- what are you talking about? Why are you being so difficult about this?” 

“You guys were right. It’s none of my business, it’s not-” Skeppy grumbles out something under his breath and Vurb scoffs. 

“Maybe speak on a register I can hear.”

“I said,” Skeppy says again, lifting his head to glare at Vurb’s profile picture. “ It’s not like /I’m/ dating him or nothing, it’s none of my business who he spends his time with.” 

“I’m gonna gloss over the weird insinuation that you made that if you were dating him you would somehow have a say in that and come back to that later, to focus on the fact that you’re being weirdly specific about this. What is your deal? Do you /want/ to date Bad or something?” Vurb asks, fully knowing the answer to that, because come on. 

He was a foot fetishist, not an idiot.  
Skeppy only dignified that was a scoff of his own and shrugs, even though Vurb wouldn’t see it. 

“No!” He lies, “And-And even if I did, it doesn’t matter. Bad doesn’t like me tha- You know what, we aren’t talking about this, this is stupid.” 

“Mmm, sure. /This/ is stupid, and not you avoiding Bad. Sure.” Vurb says. 

“I met a fangirl today.” Skeppy says instead, trying to change the subject. 

“And? What does that-” Vurb starts.

“She gave me her twitter and it’s, get this, it’s GoodGirlHalo. What are the chances?” Skeppy says, barreling forward and not noticing the distinct silence on Vurb’s side. 

Vurb had his phone unlocked and was furiously tapping away at it to both Finn and Quackity.

ToeKing: We have a situation fellas.

ElQuacko: what did dumb and dumber do now???

F1NN: What happened?

Glancing up, Vurb listens to Skeppy proceed to go into excruciating detail about the little lunch date he had gone on with ‘Hallie’.

ToeKing: Bad and Skeppy have made contact in person, I repeat, they have made first contact.

F1NN: I dont see how this is a bad thing?

ElQuacko: yeah this seems like a good first step

ToeKing: You don’t understand...Skeppy met a /Hallie/.

F1NN: oh no

ElQuacko: I don’t get it

ToeKing: Skeppy met Bad while she was out, and doesn’t realize that she was /Bad/

ElQuacko: Oh Fuck

ToeKing: Yeah

“Vurb, are you even listening to me?” Skeppy stops mid-rant about how very green Hallie’s eyes were and Vurb snaps to attention, setting his phone face down. 

“Yeah, yeah, you met a girl, why are you telling me this?” Vurb asks.

“BECAUSE VURB! I - You know-. The THING! Vurb the thing.” Skeppy whines.

“You mean the Ba-” Vurb starts.

“LALALA WE WON’T SAY THAT MUCH BUT YEAH THAT THING.” Skeppy /screams/.

“...You have problems.”

“Shut up! The thing, the thing I told you and swore you to secrecy, that thing.” Skeppy says.

“Yeah, I got that the first time Zak, what’s your point?” 

“I- I might like this girl, too?”

“...Give me a moment.” Vurb says.

Vurb mutes his mic and screams into his hands for a moment. 

ToeKing: Skeppy has taken the lead as Head Idiot.

ToeKing: He has a crush. On /Hallie/

F1NN: im...im gunna check on Bad

ElQuacko: THIS DUDE SAW BAD AND DIDN’T REALIZE??

ElQuacko: Finn what sort of black magic makeup did you send her???

Vurb unmutes and sighs, “Skeppy you don’t even really know this girl.”

“That’s the thing! We clicked like instantly, I feel like I’ve known her like all my life. I have never had something like that happen in my life it’s so crazy and I know I sound like a fucking simp right now but I’m telling you the truth. What should I do?” 

“You. You’re asking me for dating advice? Me? Skeppy did you hit your head on the way home, is Hallie actually like a hallucination you had after you beefed it on the sidewalk or something?” Vurb tries, and all he gets is outraged sputtering and shouts. “Man, I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“How’d you like, bag Quackity, I guess.”

“I highly doubt the way I convinced Quackity to give me a chance at licking his toes is going to work for you, Zak. How about you just relax and see what happens.” He sighs and hears Skeppy grumble, but not talk. “And fucking- talk to Bad. I swear. You can’t just keep pushing it off, if something is bothering you- Talk. To. Him. I cannot stress this enough. I think all of your issues will clear up if you just do that.” 

“Whatever dude.” Skeppy says, before sighing as well. “I gotta go, but thanks for the advice, I guess. Talk to you later.”

“See ya, good luck.”

Back to spinning in his chair.

Sure, he liked Hallie...But he had liked Bad for so much longer. But...Bad was with Finn. 

Growling he buries his hands in his hair and tugs at it. 

“This sucks.” He says to the empty room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad was having trouble breathing. The lunch had been fun, way more fun than she was willing to admit, and she could feel the guilt clawing at her gut. Skeppy had no idea, no idea at all, and she was /lying/ to him. A lie of omission, perhaps, but a lie nonetheless. She knew she was breathing too fast, too shallowly, but she couldn’t help it. 

Rat whines and paws at her legs and she could only sit and hold her face in her hands as she tries to calm down, mind racing with endless possibilities about how her entire world was about to collapse around her, as soon as Skeppy figures her out. 

A ping and the sound of a call coming through had her gasping, eyes wide as she looks up to see who it could possibly be. Sighing with relief when she saw it was Finn, she set her headphones on and accepts the vid call, sniffing softly and trying to pat her cheeks dry subtly. 

“Wh-what’s up, Finn?” She asks, cringing at the break in her voice. 

“Bad. I just got some interesting information.” Finn says, slight disappointment coloring his tone.

She furrows her brows and tilts her head at him. She only shrugs and shakes her head softly when he quirks an eyebrow at her. 

“W-what information?” She finally asks, when it’s apparent that he isn’t going to continue.

“Bad. Hallie, really?” He says, and she winces, looking away from the screen. “Bad, you /have/ to talk to him, you cannot think that this will end well. Vurb says that it’s all Zak talked about for like an hour. What are you thinking?” 

She swallows, and rubs at her eyes, laughing bitterly as she stares down at the eyeliner smeared on her fingers. 

“I wasn’t…” She admits, and looks up at Finn with tears tracking down her face. “He just, we ran into each other, and,” She hiccups, “He helped me pick up my bags, and then he asked me to eat with him and I couldn’t, I didn’t want to say no, I just-”

She sobs, and Finn rubs his face for a moment and sighs. 

“Bad, Bad listen to me. Take a breath for me girl, come on, count with me- In, one, two, three, four. Hold, one, two, three, four. Out.” He leads her through it a few more times until her sobbing trails off to an occasional sniffle and she seems to gather herself a little. 

“Thank you…” She says softly, absentmindedly tugging at the ends of her hair.

“Bad, you know that you have to tell him, soon, right?” 

“I know…” 

“No, I don’t think you do. It was one thing when he hadn’t already spoken to you in person. This is a whole ‘nother level. You can’t put this off, you really need to tell him.”

“I-I know, I just. I’m scared.” She admits.

“And I get that. I do, it’s not an easy thing to do what you have to, but Bad, this is past the point of no return. You gotta tell him, and soon.” Finn stresses.

“I...Okay. I will.” She says. “I-I’m honestly really tired. I think I’m going to make an early night of it and just. Hold on-I’m. Skeppy’s messaging me.”

She can see how her hands shake as she switches to the messages that are piling up quickly on the other screen. 

Skeppy: Bad. Bad. Bad. BAD. BAD. BAD BAD BAD BAD BADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBADBABDBADBABDBADBADBADBBAD

Skeppy: Bad  
BadBoyHalo: What is it, Skeppy?

“Those typing sounds better be you talking to Skeppy.” Finn says.

“I am, I am! I’m-what do I even say?” She says, glancing back at her camera pleadingly.

“The truth, preferably.” 

“That’s not helpful, Finn!” She says, pouting as she turns her attention back to the chat.

Skeppy: bad i cna see ur ona call rn stpo ignroing me!

Skeppy: i want yuor attentIONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

Skeppy: BAD

Skeppy: BAD

Skeppy: BAD

Skeppy: BAD

Skeppy: BAD

Skeppy: BAD

BadBoyHalo: WHAT SKEPPY?

Skeppy: hi

BadBoyHalo: Oh my goodness, Skeppy, what do you need?

Skeppy: I rna into taht fangirl again

BadBoyHalo: ...Yeah?

Skeppy: hwo do u kno if a girl is itno yuo?

Bad presses her hands to her eyes and laughs brokenly at her ceiling. 

“This is ridiculous.” She mutters.

“What, what’s happening?” Finn asks, and she jumps when she remembers she’s still on call with him. 

“Nothing, just. Skeppy asking something, I’ll talk to you later.” She says in a rush as she hangs up the call and steadily ignores the sound of Finn trying to call her right back. 

Skeppy: BAD U CNAT JIST LEAVE ME HAGNING MAN

BadBoyHalo: I’m right here you muffin

BadBoyHalo: I’m not really the best person to ask I guess.

Skeppy: waht do u maen? :(

BadBoyHalo: I

BadBoyHalo: I’ve never had a girlfriend, not that I haven’t tried but, just didn’t work out that way

Skeppy: what do u maen

Skeppy: uve talkd aoubt ur exes befoer

BadBoyHalo: ...Yes

Skeppy: …

Skeppy: OH

BadBoyHalo: Yeah

Skeppy: i mean tahts cool man

Bad laughs hollowly at that and sighs.

BadBoyHalo: Listen, I have to go take care of something, I’ll talk to you later, okay?

Skeppy: oaky...proisme?

BadBoyHalo: Yes, I promise

And with that she logs out and shuts off her computer, unable to take any more of the stress of the day. 

“I need a drink.” 

Rat barks at her feet and she reaches down to snuggle the dog in her lap.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy tries not to feel upset. Tries not to feel betrayed. But there was a boiling hot sickness bubbling in his stomach, and as he sat at his desk he couldn't stop thinking about it. 

He had been holding out a hope that he was just misunderstanding something. And while one part of him was singing with the fact that Bad bats for the same team as he does, it only compounded the idea that he /had/ to be dating Finn. 

And the idea that Bad wasn't willing to tell him, that it was being kept secret from him?

It made his gut clench and he felt nauseous.

Were they not best friends? This was definitely something best friends would tell each other, right?

Distantly a small part of him whispered that he was a hypocrite for never coming out to Bad as Bi, but that felt different.

He would tell him if he asked! And certainly tell him if he had a boyfriend, especially if that boyfriend was a mutual friend!

Huffing, he doesn't realize just how angry he feels suddenly as he stares at his phone on twitter.

If Bad is too busy for me now that he has Finn… fine.

His thumbs dance over the screen as he pulls up Hallie's user and follows, and quickly opens up a dm. His tongue sticks out the corner of his mouth as he hesitates and thinks of what to say.

Did he want to do this?

Glancing at his screen the chat log makes him clench his teeth.

Yeah he was doing this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bad had hoped it was the end of it. At least for a time being. But no. She had been the stupid one to give Skeppy her twitter alt.

Worst move of the century there really.

But he had looked so disappointed and she couldn't stand to have been the one to make him look that way so she had caved and done it.

So she really only had herself to blame right now as she got a notification that she was being dm'd by Skeppy himself.

She just stares at the messages, not quite sure what to do. 

Meanwhile Finn has messaged Vurb, who is just about done with this bullshit, if he were to be entirely honest. He wants to watch this stupid action movie with his boyfriend, he wants to maybe get some action later, again with said boyfriend over vid call, and he can’t just focus and enjoy himself with his friends running around being idiots.

So as Finn proceeds to blow up his phone about how he didn’t think Bad was going to do it, he paused the movie and got on twitter.

"What's wrong babe?" Quackity asks.

"I'm tired if this secret identity bullshit Bad is pulling. So I'm giving a little push." Vurb says as he finishes his tweet and posts it, shutting off his phone.

"You may want to either silence your phone or turn it off for the next….i dunno three hours. Do you reckon three hours is enough time?"

"Babe...what did you do?"

"A push, that’s all. Nothing horrible, most fans already know of the GoodGirlHalo twitter and think it’s a fan account anyways so-” Vurb says as he settles back in for the movie. 

Bad, however, was only more so panicked as she stared at the notifications. 

“Vurb no…” She murmurs as she watches the replies and retweets 

JustVurb: @skeppyextra who is @goodgirlhalo, you didn’t tell me you were two timing @badboyhalo how could you

She didn’t need this right now, Skeppy was dming her, people are @ing her on both her main and alt account, Finn was steadily trying to get her attention and she just could not take it anymore. 

She watches as the worst possible thing that could happen pops up on her phone.

skeppyextra: so yeah in short i think ur rly cool 

skeppyextra: what do u think abotu going out sometime? 

skeppyextra: on purpose this time lol

No no no no no this was not happening to her right now.

She felt her heart crack a little, the want and despair wrestling to come out on top. Skeppy was asking her out, but he was asking /her/ out. He probably didn't like guys, and despite the very thing she dreamed about being just within her grasp, it wasn't real. It was just a cruel joke by the world because there was no way Skeppy would want to stay with her when he found out, and he would find out if she said yes. 

So instead of turning him down gently, she panics.

goodgirlhalo: I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend…

skeppyextra: oh

skeppyextra: no Ofc u do im so sorry if i made this weird

skeppyextra: ill see myself otu

"This is too much, this is just too much right now, I can't-" she turns her phone off and throws it at her bed before angrily taking off her clothes and getting into her shower.

At least she couldn't tell what were tears in there. Could pretend she didn't just lied to Skeppy because she couldn't come clean with him.

It hurt a lot. That Skeppy barely knew this idea of her that he knew as Hallie, but was so ready to try and jump into a relationship with her when she had been here the whole time.

It just solidified the idea in her head that Skeppy didn't like Bad that way, was probably straight and would never be with her. Not the way she hoped.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy steadily avoids everyone for a week. It's easy enough. A few tweets here and there, and his scant few backlogged videos he had in reserve for if he ever got sick and no one other than those who he was running from suspected a thing. 

His notifications made him anxious every time he bothers to look, too many missed messages and call invites making his stomach twist.

He had to talk to his friends eventually, but he just couldn't bring himself to do so. He didn't know how to act, didn't think he could put on a smile and laugh as he normally did.

He was too caught up in the idea that Bad was just barely out of reach, that he was probably going to drift further and further from him the longer he dated Finn, and his sorry attempt at a rebound, does it count as a rebound if they never dated?, had blown up in his face. Because of course a girl as cute and sweet as Hallie was already taken. 

He was an idiot for thinking otherwise.

So what, if he was moping. So what, if he was acting like it was the end of the world. It sure felt like it, and he just didn't want to have to plaster on a funny face while he felt like he was dying inside. So sue him

But he knew he couldn't do it forever. Despite it all he misses Bad way too much to keep putting off answering him.

So when a call came through, he only hesitates for a second before finally accepting it.

"SKEPPY!? I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU FOR DAYS WHAT IS GOING ON??" Bads voice was high and tight and he cringes at the fact that he had made his friend sound so upset.

" 'm sorry Bad, I just wasn't really feeling up to it…" He mumbles, rubbing a circle into his jeans with his thumb and refusing to look at the screen.

It was silent and he could hear Bad sigh and he waits for whatever lecture he was about to get.

" 'Geppy...are you at least feeling a bit better now?" He asks, and Skeppy could only shrug.

"Not really." He admits.

"Aw, Skeppy. Is there anything i can do to make you feel better?" He asks.

Skeppy frowns and sighs again, "It's not your fault Bad, don't worry about it I've just got some stuff going on it's nothing."

"I dont believe you. Tell me what's going on, we can think of something.

Gritting his teeth he banged his desk with his palms lightly.

"No! It's just something I have to get over, don’t worry about it!" He says, finally looking at the screen.

His mouth goes dry as he catches sight of a familiar pair of platforms just barely in frame behind Bad.

Bad is saying something, but it all just sort of sounds like droning buzzing as Skeppy blinks, and his mind starts drawing lines, connecting the dots.

"Oh my god." He says suddenly and Bad stops.

"What? What?" He asks, looking confused.

Skeppy has a hand over his face as he tries to calm down, but he just keeps staring at the platforms and he can't help it.

He starts to laugh.

"You! Are unbelievable! I thought you were dating Finn! I cant believe I’ve been so /stupid/." He manages, his laughing has a hard edge to it, bitter.

Bads face on cam goes pale, and he whirls around, scanning his room before going still, facing the boots.

"Yeah, not so secret now, huh?" Skeppy says, voice dripping with hurt and frustration.

"Skeppy, I can explain-" Bad tries, but stops when Skeppy lets out a short bark of a laugh

"Oh can you? How long has this been going on? How long have you been dating Hallie? Oh I bet that was so funny, you two talking about me and how stupid I am for hitting on your girlfriend." He rants, not noticing the momentary confusion before Bad realizes his mistake.

"Skepp-"

"Man you must have thought it was sooo funny, Skeppy makes eyes at a girl at the coffee shop and it turns out to be your girlfriend. It explains so much, the purse, the twitter handle. Does everyone but me already know? Is that why Vurb made that tweet? Am I seriously the last person to know you have a girlfriend? What the fuck, Bad, I thought we were best friends-"

"SKEPPY SHUT UP AND LISTEN FOR A MOMENT, YOU MUFFINHEAD!" Bad eventually startles him into silence. "It's not what you think.

"Yeah, okay" he scoffs but Bad just continues over him.

"It's...fine. You aren't going to listen to me. I get it. Come to my house tomorrow. I’m sending you the address right now." Bad says, sounding slightly defeated.

"What? Why? How does this explain anything-" Skeppy starts

"Just. Come over. This needs to be done in person, I'm not doing it over call." Bad says, and Skeppy watches as an address pops up in his phone messages.

"Is this some sort of trap where you menace me with knives for hitting on your girl?"

Bad sputters and groans, "No! Just. Come over, and I'll tell you everything, okay?"

"Everything?"

"Everything."

"...okay…"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been weird. Getting off of the call with Skeppy after that point. Neither seemed all that willing to talk much more, both just shooting the other sideways glances until Bad had finally gotten sick of it and said he’d talk to Skeppy the next day. 

So he was in a dress, despite not really feeling like it today, because it was to make a point dang it. Short of making Skeppy watch him get dressed up femininely, which he was /not/ going to do, he didn’t see any other choice. This would be like ripping off the bandaid. Quick, fast, not necessarily painless but the least painful way he could think. 

So he is in a nice soft green sundress, no make up, hair down, and was pacing as he tries to wait patiently for Skeppy to show up. 

The knock at his door has him frozen in his spot. He could just, not answer the door. He could just leave him on the doorstep and deal with the fallout that came after, could, could could-

But he couldn’t. He had to make this right. So with a heaviness in his limbs, he made his way to the door and opens it. 

“B-Oh. Uh-Hi, Hallie.” Skeppy said, quickly avoiding Bad’s eyes.

“Not quite.” He says, in his normal tone, and watches as Skeppy tenses up and looks up, as if trying to peer around him to find ‘Bad’ but only getting more confused as he stands there in the doorway.

“Come on, you muffin.” Bad says, grabbing Skeppy by the arm and tugging him inside. 

He laughs softly at the vague babbling he was doing, as he is sat down on the couch and Bad sits next to him, turning his body to face him. He watches Skeppy open his mouth and close it a few times, reminding him of a fish before he takes pity on the guy.

“So-” And he is immediately interrupted. 

“So you’ve been Hallie this who-”

“Yes.”

“So we first met at-”

“Correct.”

“And when you said you had a boyfriend?”

“I panicked.”

A silence stretches between them, and Bad looks down at his hands, not sure where to go from here. He felt like he wasn’t actually in his body, almost. Like he was just watching everything unfold like a movie, he felt so detached, and maybe that was because he knew if he did he would panic even harder. 

He was broken from his thoughts as Skeppy coughs.

Their eyes met, and Skeppy smiles at him, too bright, like the sun. 

“So how do you feel about that date, then?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skeppy was a little dizzy with the mixture of feelings still rushing through him. His heart had just about jumped out of his chest when he had seen ‘Hallie’ answer the door, all the confirmation he had needed that he was right. He had been just about to spin on his heel and jet out of there when Bad had said hello, but he had been nowhere in sight. 

So Anxiety, check. Confusion, check. More confusion, and his brain just about started to smoke when he realized Bad’s voice was coming /from/ ‘Hallie.

A sliver of hope, when Bad had started to answer his rapid fire questions, that transformed to excitement and joy when he watched the blush rush over his friends' features at his question. 

Nothing could really bring him down at this point, even as he got a bit of a lesson on some lesser known genders and a pretty thorough walk through Bad’s personal feelings about his gender and how he interacts with presentation. 

He wouldn’t lie, it was kind of a lot. But the feeling of Bad’s hand in his as they sat on the couch and talked made it more than worth it. 

One thing was still bothering him though. He waits until Bad seemingly runs out of words, and a calm soft silence falls over them for a moment. 

“Hey, Bad?”

“Mm?”

“Why...why didn’t you just tell me about all of this earlier?”

He tightens his grip on Bad’s hand as he goes to pull away, watching with worried eyes as Bad bites at his lower lip. 

“I-I was scared.” Bad admits, returning the hand squeeze. “I...I was so worried you would think I was gross or-or-”

“Never. Bad, I’ve liked you for so long, I could never.” 

Bad laughs and scoots in closer, laying his head on the other’s shoulder. 

“Well I know that /now/. But I didn’t know that, and-and I know I’m not /that/ pretty-”

“What the fuck do you mean, Bad you are so pretty-”

“Language!” 

“No, like, listen to me. For real. You are so pretty it’s not even fair. Boy, girl, whatever- you are always pretty.” 

“ ‘Geppy…” Bad murmurs, trying to turn away but that wouldn’t do.

Catching him before he tries to run, Skeppy puts his hands on either side of Bad’s face and carefully pulls him in, looking for any sign of resistance before closing the distance and pressing their lips together. 

It was careful, and a little nervous, but all the same, so sweet that even as they broke away for a breath, Skeppy was leaning in to try and chase the feeling as Bad giggles and bats at his chest playful. 

Grinning, Skeppy pulls Bad back again and starts to pepper his face with kisses, small pecks all over his face as the other laughed louder, face red from breathlessness as he was overwhelmed with the attention. 

When Bad accidentally jostles him a little with an elbow, he laughs and leans back to give him a moment to breathe. 

Bright eyes look at him, a smirk worn across his face. 

“You’re gonna be the one to tell all our friends.” Bad says.

“What?! Why do I have to do it?”

“Because.”

“Because why?”

Skeppy narrows his eyes before getting an equally wide smirk across his face as he picks up Bad’s hand in his and brings it to his lips. 

“I guess if you really want me to.” He says, as he presses soft kisses to the Bad’s knuckles. 

He was just enjoying how flustered he could make him. 

“Skeppy! Stop it!” Bad cries out with a laugh as he tries to tug his hand away, but only gets a shower of kisses across his arms and face again for his troubles.

“Never.”


	2. Porn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is literally JUST porn, you don't have to read this at all to know the story, it affects nothing plotwise.

Skeppy’s back hits the wall, and he grunts even as he pulls Bad closer. He threads his hands through her hair, and gives a careful tug, testing the boundaries, he knew that Bad’s scalp was sensitive. When all he got in return was a breathy gasp and hips pressed into his own, he smirks as he pulls a little harder. 

“‘Geppy-” Bad moans against his lips, sounding a touch annoyed.

“What, don’t you like it when I do this?” Skeppy asks as he pulls carefully again, managing to get Bad to tilt her head before the other narrowed her gaze at him. 

“I d-do but you are being a muff-muffin!” She says as she bucks her hips into Skeppy’s, letting him know just how affected she was by the teasing. “But you s-said you’d let me take charge this time.” 

Mentally rolling his eyes, Skeppy sighed before loosening his grip in Bad’s hair, running his fingers through it and standing on his toes to kiss at Bad’s chin. 

“Those platforms are unfair, babe. I can’t reach you.” He whines, as she stands upright, just barely out of kissing range. 

“That’s sort of the point, ‘Geppy.” She says before backing away. 

He is quick to follow, hands drifting down to her hips to try and pull her back again, to follow them as they sway. 

“Hey- no, I wasn’t complaining, get back here.” Skeppy says with a laugh even as he lets Bad push and pull him towards their bed. 

“I’m making it more fair, isn’t that what you wanted?” Bad says as she backs him into the bed and pushes him over, leaving him laid out on his back. 

She wastes no time at all in climbing on top of him, legs straddling his lap as she looked down at him. She looks like a queen, looking down her nose at him, and his breath catches in his throat as he watches, mesmerized by how she looks as she makes herself comfortable. He reaches up to thumb at where her thighs crease at her hips, but she slaps his hands away playfully. 

Pulling a pouting face, he looks up at her. 

“Hey! What was that for?” He asks, a shiver running through his body as she presses down against his throbbing cock through his jeans. 

“You promised. Don’t make me tie you down.” She says softly, yet firm as she runs her hands down his chest, teasing at the end of his shirt. “Lean up a little.” 

He doesn’t hesitate, just obeys as she pushes the fabric up and smirks, tweaking a nipple and giggling lightly at the way that his whole body twitches in response. 

“Baaad, come on.” Skeppy huffs, annoyed with the shirt bunched up under his chin as she takes her time, running fingers over his skin. 

“No,” Was the simple reply, “You said I could do what I wanted this time. So shush.”

She got a glint in her eyes that had him swallowing thickly under her weight that was rocking against him so deliciously slow. 

“Unless...you don’t want to?” She asks, a grin wide on her face. 

“No! No, I definitely want to-” He starts to protest as she rises up on her knees to lift away from him. 

“Mm. Good. Take off your shirt.” She demands, and his brain stalls for a moment before he scrambles to action, trying to get the shirt to come off, but getting stuck in it for a moment. 

His own hot breath surrounds him as he struggles, not quite sitting upright as he tries to get the bunched up cotton off of his face, before he hears Bad laughing at him. Not even giggling, but outright laughing at him before he feels her grip the shirt and help him. 

Taking in a breath of much cooler fresh air, he chokes on his own spit when he finds out that Bad’s already taken her shirt off too. She was a vision, in only the soft skirt and platform boots, nothing else.

It didn’t matter that he had already seen Bad in various states of undress, it blew him away every time. Her skin was pale and smooth and his fingers itched to reach out and touch, press into the softness and try to pull more moans from her mouth. 

He must have been a bit more obvious than he had hoped about his intentions, before Bad leans down, one hand catching both his wrists and pinning them above his head. Before he can think better of it, his hips jerk up, chasing the heat of Bad’s thighs, and the hand on his wrists tighten for just a moment in warning. 

“B-ad~ Bad please,” He gasps, and lets out a strangled moan as he feels Bad thumb at his cheek with a too sweet smile. 

“So impatient, “ She murmurs, as she presses down on him again, rolling her hips and watching him shudder with heavy lidded eyes. “So needy.” 

He throws his head back and arches his back, trying to get more of his skin to rub against Bad’s, but all he gets for his effort is a soft laugh and cool air as Bad leans back away from him again. 

“S-stop teasing me-” He tries to say, but it gets garbled as Bad sticks her thumb in his mouth and he automatically opens, eyes trained on Bad’s as he feels the pad of her thumb rub on his tongue. 

“You don’t get to make demands right now, love.” Bad whispers as she plays with his mouth methodically, “Just relax. Let me take care of you.” 

His whole body shakes with need before he falls limp, the bed spread against his back cushioning him as he forces his muscles to go lack and whines as Bad smiles down at him proudly. 

“Such a good boy for me, so sweet.” She says as she uses her thumb still in his mouth to open his jaw wider. 

Leaning down she pulls him by the mouth to make him turn his head and bites down on his throat, ripping a loud moan from him as she sucks a dark bruise into his skin. 

Skeppy pants, fingers flexing as he drools around the thumb still in his mouth, and his eyes flutter as she pulls back and looks at her work, pulling her thumb out of his mouth to press it into the hickey on his neck instead, rolling her hips down against him as he writhes a little under her. 

“I’m going to give you back your hands, but you have to keep them where *I* put them.”

Skeppy nods, before writhing under her again as she presses into his hickey again, the pressure harsher this time. 

“Use your words, love.”

“Y-yes, yes, I understand Bad. Please-” Skeppy starts and shuts up at the fiery look in his lover’s eyes. 

“What did I say about making demands, baby?” She tuts at him, before slowly scooting up the bed, until her skirt was tickling at his neck. “I think you need to make it up to me, for not listening.”

“Yes, yes-” Skeppy says, before he feels his hands be placed on Bad’s hips, her fingers tightening on his for only a moment, a reminder to keep his hands where they were placed before she scooted the last few inches forward and rocked her dick against his lips. 

He sticks his tongue out and manages a small smirk as Bad’s hips jerks before the smirk is completely ruined by Bad pressing in further, he can feel the tip of Bad’s dick at the back of his throat and he tenses for a moment. His hands grip Bad’s hips and he takes a moment to steadily breathe through his nose, looking up at Bad, who is arched above him. Pale skin flushed red and on display for his eyes only. After he fights down the urge to gag, he pulls her closer still, forcing her deeper into his throat as he tries to coax more whines and moans from her. He closes his eyes as he concentrates on the feeling, the taste of her skin in his mouth and the slightly bitter hint of her precum at the very back of his tongue. The slick slide as she thrusts her hips, the fluttering of the skirt against his chest. He can feel the drool that is collecting at the edge of his lips, but can’t find it in him to care as she starts to rock with him, one hand coming down and tangling in his hair and pulling his head closer still. 

Bad’s dick was so deep in his throat he pats at her hip for a moment and she backs off as he gulps down air. He feels a hand on his cheek and leans into it with a quiet hum. 

“You okay love? Do you want to keep going?” She asks him after he catches his breath. 

“Yeah, just, gimme a second babe.” He says as he rubs small circles into her hips, keeping his hands there even now. 

“You did so good for me baby, so good,” Bad says as she plays idly with his nipples, grinning at the way he strains under her. “Such a good boy, I think I should reward you.” 

He whines as she pulls away from him fully, but his disappointment is short lived as she turns and straddles his head with her thighs and hovers over him, just barely brushing the tip of her cock against his lips as he feels her unbutton his jeans and shove them down, pulling them off and flinging them off somewhere on the floor to be tripped over later. 

The skirt falls around his face, focusing all of his attention on what is immediately in front of him. The soft smooth expanse of Bad’s thighs bracketing his head, and her dripping cock so close, but as he tries to strain his head up to mouth at her, she pinches his hip and he yelps at the feeling. 

“Wait a second you muffin.” She scolds him before finally pulling him out of his boxers and giving him a lazy pump with her hand. “Okay, now you can begin.” 

He doesn’t have much time to act on the permission, he feels her lips suck at his tip, and a firm hand holding his hips down and loses all sense of where he is for a moment at the sensation. He vaguely hears moaning, and only after a moment of blinking realizes it’s him. Reaching up, even as he feels the heat rise in his face from how loud he had been, he moves Bad’s hips into a better position and guides her back into his mouth. 

The position makes her go even deeper into his throat, but it was also more of a straight shot, and he can breathe easier even as he feels his gag reflex try to kick in. Focusing on the warm tight feeling of her mouth on him, he clenches his thumb in his fist as he opens his mouth as wide as he can and squeezes her ass. 

He can feel her moan around his dick, and the vibrations have him thrusting up, and he knows the slap to his hip was coming before feels it as he hears her cough and gag from the sudden movement. 

“‘Geppyy-” She whines at him before letting her legs fall further apart and pushing further into his throat.

He groans around her, hands tight on her ass as he lets her fuck his throat. 

“Y-you couldn’t just b-be good for me?” She taunts him, her breath puffing against his dick that was being left untouched as she chased her own pleasure. “I w-would have taken such good c-care of you if you had just-behaved-” 

Her words get choppy as she pants, thrusting in and out of his mouth faster now, hardly giving him a moment to gasp around her as she pushes and hits the back of his throat repeatedly before she drops her hips onto his face entirely. 

He felt her pulse in his throat, and was distantly thankful she was so deep in that he wouldn’t have to taste the cum as he struggles to swallow around her. A few more lazy, shaky legged pumps, and she whines as he continues to suck and lick at her length before she pulls away from him. 

“Too much, too much baby.” She gasps, rolling over onto her back near him and pants. 

He whines and reaches down after a moment to take care of himself, and gets his hands slapped again. 

“Bad, please, I’m so hard right now-” He protests as she sits up, face red and eyes still slightly glazed before she locks her gaze with his.

“No. I’m not d-done with you yet.” She says, before getting on her hands and knees to lean over and get to the lube in their bedside table. Glancing over her shoulder she smirks at him, “Just give me a second. I’ll take good care of you.” 

He leans up on his elbows to watch as she reaches back and rubs a slick finger at her entrance. She’s laid out on the bed, on her stomach, watching him over her shoulder with a sly look. Her ass is perfectly framed by her legs that she has kicked up in the air, the black of her platforms contrasting with the pale expanse of her skin, even with it flushed as it is. 

She smirks more, as she watches his cock twitch at the show she is putting on, and he sits up more, wondering just how much he could try to get away with. She lets out a high moan, and lifts her ass up just a little, humping at the bed beneath her as she works herself open, fitting a third finger in. He reaches towards her and freezes at the glare she shoots him before she puts her legs down and lifts her ass higher into the air, and he bites at his bottom lip at the sight. He’s caught between moaning and laughter, the grumpy look she shoots him as she looks at him, upside down and glaring past her own cock both hilarious, and strangely arousing. 

“Stop laugh-laughing at me,” She gasps out as she fits a third and final finger in, and really he doesn’t feel much like laughing at that point as his eyes zero in on her hand, the movements and slick sounds completely distracting him from any joke he was about to do. 

“Me? Never, never never.” He mutters as he reaches for her ass and manages to get a handful. 

He smirks at her reaction as she whines and presses back towards his hands as he spreads her cheeks and watches her fingers spread and scissor. 

He is completely taken by surprise when she takes them out and sits back, knocking him down onto his back once more and she quickly turns, throwing her leg over his lap again and hovering over him. 

“Slow, or fast, baby? Tell me soon or I’ll pick for you~” She asks, and he groans at the feeling of his tip just barely brushing against her skin. 

His tongue feels like it’s sticking to the roof of his mouth as he lets out a gasp and his hips jerk, chasing her heat but she only leans away as he swallows thickly and tries to talk. 

“Pl-ease Bad, fa-” 

“Oh, too late,” She says, leaning down and lightly teasing him, not doing much more than letting his cock slip between her thighs, “You couldn’t even follow that simple direction? Poor ‘Geppy, out of your mind like this. Can’t even string a sentence together, like a good boy.” 

He squeezes his eyes shut and throws his head back as he feels her hand reach down and palm at him, holding him steady as she sinks onto his tip achingly slow. Her other hand is pressed on his hip, fingers digging into the flesh and leaving behind hot searing points of pain that have him panting louder and biting back a moan as she teases him. 

“Do you like that, love? Do you want more?” She asks him as she rocks, never taking him any further than the tip, the wet lewd popping noises as she lifts off of him driving him insane.

He moans and nods, opening his eyes only to see that same self satisfied smile firmly planted on her face. 

Leaning down she rubs her nose against his before whispering to him, “Then beg for it.”

“Bad! Please- please, please baby-” He gasps, ”Sweetheart- please.”

He tries, legs burning as he struggles to move against her, but her weight over him is too firm and she only cooes at him, giggling breathlessly as she rocks against him. 

“Good boy~” She moans as she sinks down, taking her time and savoring the stretch. 

He could do nothing but moan, throat feeling like the sound was ripping on its way out as her too-hot heat enveloped him, tight despite her prep. It punches the air out of his lungs as she carefully settles against him until she is finally at his base, and he can only let out a strangled moan as she rocks back and forth before lifting herself up, almost entirely off of him and slams back down on him again. 

It’s too much, he is so pent up, so close from before and his whole body trembles from the rising feeling in his gut. He watches her from under heavy lidded eyes as she rides him mercilessly, the loud sounds of their skin slapping against each other as she tears him apart at the seams, the heat of her hands on his chest as she pushes against him for leverage. 

He tenses, eyes squeezing shut as he feels the wave crest, and lets out a loud desperate whine as she stops and waits. 

The wave lulls, and he knows he has to be crying, the wet trails on his cheeks cold on his flushed skin. 

“Wh-what? Babe?” He asks, looking up at her smiling face. 

“ ‘Geppy, you need to listen better.” She says, trailing her fingertips over his chest, making him shiver from how sensitive everything feels. “I told you I’m not done with you yet~”

She lifts slowly, inch by inch and locks eyes with him, one hand coming up and tapping at his cheek when his eyes flutter closed. 

“Look at me. I want to see you.” She whispers, huffing as she flexes, almost coming completely off of him before sinking back down again with a half swallowed moan, biting at her bottom lip as she rolls her hips. 

She was hard again, when he glances down, and her cock is dripping onto his stomach, making a mess but he couldn’t find it in him to care. Reaching down, he watches with a hungry expression as her movements stutter and she grinds down, gasping as he strokes her over sensitive dick. 

“Oh-oh yes...mmm ‘Geppy, ‘Geppy, ‘Geppy-” She chants as she picks up her pace, and he thrusts up into her, her hands busy grabbing a hold of his shoulders to keep her balance as he jerks her off, matching the pace of his thrusts. 

“Come on sweetheart, just like that, come again, I know you can-” Skeppy says, and grabs her by the back of her head, tugging harshly at her hair to bring her in for a sloppy hard kiss, all teeth and moans. 

She shakes, and keens into his mouth as he feels her cum coat his hand and he lets go, grabbing her by the hips and pounding into her as she moans directly into his ear, collapsing against him as he finally cums as well, holding her down on his dick as deep as he could get as he felt the feeling crashing over him. 

Like a puppet with it’s string cut, he lays limply against the bed, rubbing Bad’s back as he tries to catch his breath. 

“ “Geppyyyy…” Bad whines, and he turns his head to press a soft kiss to her temple. 

“Yes, Bad?” 

“You took control at the end!” She pouts at him and rolls away, only to laugh as he rolls after her and snuggles up, spooning her, “Noooo, we’re so sticky, Skeppy! Let me at least get clean.”

“Nah. ‘m tired and want to cuddle.” He sighs as he pulls the blanket over them. “You were in control for most of it, babe. Are you really that upset that I helped at the end?”

“....No….” She admits as she moves around and shuffles. 

He was about to ask what she was doing, but then the heavy thunks of her platforms hitting the floor next to their bed answered that question. 

“Okay then. Come here so I can cuddle then.” He says with a laugh as she sticks her tongue out at him before bullying him to roll onto his back, curling in and laying her head on his chest. 

“I’ll just tie you up next time.” She threatens. 

“I look forward to it.”


End file.
